MarShawn McCarrel was a freedom fighter and he taught me how to fight. But first he taught me how to love.
I was privileged to meet him December 2014 at The Wildfire's Convening. The first night we were there hanging out, he and Alyssa, another member of the Ohio Student Association, invited me to hang with them. I remember us hanging on that creek, talking about everything silly and serious and being family to each other. I got the luxury of doing this again with MarShawn another night there. From him, I felt no judgment, no pressure to impress. I was myself and he loved and accepted me. He listened to me and the weird things I said. He loved me; that was just the kind of person he was: a lover of people.
Although MarShawn left a great impression on me that week, seeing him be loving, artistic, and a leader, my admiration was elevated even more for him when we all parted ways and became FB friends.
Organizers can accomplish so much and get so little recognition for it, but MarShawn did both. He had many interviews and awards and thanks for the strong building he did in Ohio, Feed the Streets being one of his greatest accomplishment. With all the love he got, there was also hate. There was also depression. There were also demons.
I still can't conceptualize him shooting himself. I still can't believe he planned this all. I still can't believe his death was his last action. He was in New York and I didn't reach out. I wish I did. I wish I knew I wouldn't get a chance to see him again.
We've got to love and celebrate each other.
If I could best understand what it is to be love, community, impactful, authentic and indelible, I'd look at MarShawn. He magnifies the idea of what all those things are. I truly believe those who are filled with the most love have the most pain. MarShawn was a comet, fast and filled with light. But comets die out quick; all that energy builds and moves fast for many to see, then it dies.
I love you MarShawn, FLOhio loves you and the nation loves you.
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