At a routine setting of mine I encountered something rather traumatizing. Perhaps it was numbing; either way it is something I know no one wants to experience. navigating this life as a black woman allows for me to go through racism regularly without anyone having to say "I hate you because of your color". Unfortunately, in this moment of racism that is exactly what happened. And the oppressor: a 2 year old white girl.
"I don't like brown people" were her exact words. She said this to me across the room with an open mouth smile. Her boldness to say it to me was already baffling, but she also let it be known she knew fully what she was doing in that instance. "What did you just say" is what fortunately came out of my mouth because a more colorful message could've slipped, and that would just be my reflex. Her silence and looking away prompted me to ask again. She then says in a way less menacing way "I don't like silver people". Once again this shows this very young human knew exactly what she said, since she lied about it. I kept my composure and told her we're going to tell a person of power what you just said. I walked over to her, extend my hand, and walked her to the phone.
When we have people in power, people who can be of aid, we assume they will do that-we assume they'll help. The reality is though sometimes these people fail us. Intentional or not, there are crucial moments when we need them and they're just not there. When I dialed a certain overseer, this proved true.
I told her what child said and then what the child tried to cover it up with. She told me to ask the child what a silver person looks like. "And what about the first comment?" "What do I tell her parents?" Both extremely reasonable questions, yet I was made to feel like I was being over sensitive or something. "This child isn't racist. They aren't a racist person. We're not going to give this power" is the response I received. This was infuriating. Don't give this power? The system's power is what got us to this point! And here you are protecting them by keeping silent and telling me to do the same.
This child may very well not be a racist, but she came to this belief through some influence. It may have been from racist people in her life. Or perhaps from observing the differences between being white or black. Children pick up on social dynamics more than we think. While this child seems to have parents who work to raise her not to think like this at all, she has still been able to come to this conclusion. I'd like to be more shocked at this series of events, but I really cant be. This is an alarming racial climate and I hate that I went through this. I hate that I know I wasn't the first and I wont be the last. I hate that we can have superiors who allow for this type of thing to occur and encourage us to be passive. But ultimately love wins, and thankfully another person in power came to my aid.
I briefly told this other supervisor about the incident because I was looking for the head honcho. But she still called me back to see how the situation was going. I told her what my boss told me to do and she heard my discontent and need for real help. She then explained how even her niece who's father is dark says remarks that appear racist too. She explained how they have conversations with her and how I can make a positive with this situation. This prompted me to find a book about different shades and kept asking the child is all these shades were beautiful. She kept replying with an open mouthed smile, "yes".
We make the difference in race relations for the next generation. It's up t us to be actively fighting racism, or else it will always conquer. So for folks who deal with young people, I hope my experience will encourage you to curve the way a child thinks about people of color. That child my very well grow into a full blown racist, but I'll know I did what I needed to ensure she knows there's another way to think and live. I also hope bosses who ignore these pressing issues are held accountable and realize their team is counting on them in more way than they know.
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